Does your work environment feel like a spiritual battleground at times? Mine sure does! There are plenty of times when I am peaceful and just doing my thing, then there are times (like today) when the devil comes at me swinging. Honestly, he ( lower case “h” intentionally) attacks like a parasite; and if we aren’t aware of his games, he will slither his way into every nook and cranny of our mind.
God has the power to stop Satan’s slithering with the clap of His hands, but He doesn’t always. Why would God allow us to experience such turmoil and confusion? In 1 Peter, 4:12-13 it says “beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal among you, which comes upon you for your testing, as though some strange thing were happening to you; but to the degree that you share the sufferings of Christ, keep on rejoicing, so that also at the revelation of His glory you may rejoice with exultation. He allows it for the same reason that as parents, we step back and let our children make mistakes. It is the best way to learn tough lessons and to grow strong character.
The struggle I have been having lately is that creepy little lie that I am not good enough. I don’t have the right personality to be liked. I am not approachable. People avoid me intentionally. Satan has been trying really hard lately to get me to believe that; and I’m telling you, IT. IS. SO. HARD. to push those lies aside. These thoughts have left me feeling lonely and rejected.
When we really latch on to WHO’s we are, it’s much easier to accept WHO we are. I know that in my head, but I can’t seem to get it into the depths of my heart where it becomes an instinctive value. The other truth that I know is that it doesn’t matter what people think, whether they like me or don’t like me, or even what they say about me. That is also an extremely hard truth to wrap my head around. No matter how hard I try, it is a constant battle. I am constantly keeping my thoughts in check and telling myself “It doesn’t matter Angela!” What does matter is what God thinks of me. Are my actions and words pleasing Him? That is all that matters.
Another truth that I am clinging to lately is found in Romans 12:2. It says Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
The truth is, maybe I am being “set aside” by my peers. And maybe that’s okay? I certainly want to be approachable. I certainly want to be a person that exudes love and compassion; but if that is what is in my heart, THAT is what God sees. And THAT is what’s important.
I will continue fighting the battle. The prize I am striving for is far too precious to give up; and the price that has been paid is beyond comprehension.
My prayer is that you will find relatable content here. Have you been fighting a battle too? Do you struggle at work to stay on the straight and narrow? Man, it’s tough! What are some ways that you have found helpful in the fight for peace and joy? I would love to hear from you!